Why So Serious?

Aiight Bytches, I'm Back...I know it's been bout 3 months, but I think I'm gonna do better this time.....we shall see????? I'll be back with some heat!!!!

Joe Budden Talks about getting Stole

Coon Ass.....

This coon ass coop was pressed....

"This Robbery was off the chain...."

I Throw My Money on Tha Floor.........

I have no words just yet...LMAO!

My Main Man Marion!!!

Now we all have come to know and love our beloved crack loving ex mayor Marion, and apparently the ladies have come to love him too..

Now don't get me wrong, I'm all for getting head but you can't just go putting chicks out because they not tryin to get their jaws movin.. Come on Marion, you're 60+ and I know u gotta use it til u lose it but this shyt has got to stop..I remember this man giving me my 1st job (no pun intended) I got paid to sit in my middle school and do NOTHING, for $3.85 an hour.. the check covered candy, carryout and fresh Reebok classics every 2 weeks.. what more could a 13 yr old ask for? Head maybe......

Anyway, then there was the infamous crack smokin bust of the late 80's...I remember people selling "that gott damn bytch set me up t-shirts in front of Discount Mart on Alabama Ave....." and boy did I want one...

Years go by, Marion does the community well, but can never get from the oppression of his choices in women..They done locked homie up a few times. I'm sure he's a good dude, but he has got to know THEY watching & waiting homie....



Now the one thing all men should learn, don't leave no voicemails in a bad situation.. we've all gotten mad before and left some shyt that we wish we shouldn't have but this guy...Jeez!

Here are a few excerpts:

“I’m gone. I’m not gonna think about it anymore. I’m not gonna worry about it like I used to, not gonna pray about it, not gonna do nothing....You don’t even exist. Goodbye, good luck, God bless you.”

“Wake up, Donna. Come down here and enjoy yourself. Let’s meet and try to resolve this thing. You don’t want to meet? I’m gone.You won’t hear from me again.”

“I’m getting ready to leave the situation, but call me and we can meet away from your house. I would suggest in a park or something and talk about this....I want to help save your life. So, call me.”

“Donna, this thing’s gotten outta hand. That’s too bad. I don’t want to continue talking to you about anything and I don’t want to press no charges, I don’t wanna do nothin.’ I just want to be left alone and so you oughtta do the same thing. Don’t call me.”

“Donna, you don’t have to answer your home phone....Don’t call me back. I will not take a call from you; I’m not gonna call you, so this is it.”

“Donna, call me....I’d like to apologize and settle this matter. It’s not anybody’s interest to continue.”

“Call me and let me know what you think ’cause I’m ready to end all this and let it go. I apologize to you. I’m sorry. You know I love you and that after this we gonna go our separate ways and I’ll give up trying to help....Call me.”

“It’s not in either one of our interests or anybody’s interest to keep this stuff going. I’m prepared...to apologize...And, uh, so call me back. Please. On my cell phone.”

GOTT DAMN MARION! If this ain't some Bipolar shyt! STOP!!! We'll see how this plays out but apparently the chick was prepared! Maybe Marion thinks he's this guy who also went by the name of Marion

But No he's only.....

Dawn of a New Day

Awww shyt!

Lately I've been having alot to say on all my various other social networking sites, but I've neglected my blog for far too long. I'm not gonna bore you with a bunch of rules and shyt like that. This is a place for me to voice my opinion on anything. Whether it be my daily commute, or some other random fuqqery I've experienced on my day to day. Feel free to come by check me out and leave feedback....But please DO NO BE SENSITIVE HERE, cuz honestly I don't give a shyt about how you feel... LOL! Let the day begin and be blessed!

Joker

Real Uncut WTF is Happening Fuqqery!!!

HEY HEY HEY NYGGA! That's all I can say about this shyt....Just watching this video made me angry, lol.. I don't mean like fuqq my life angry, I mean like fuqq YOUR life angry...LOL! *whispers* murder murder kill kill.....I ain't never heard of this movie, but you betta believe I'm on netflix RIGHT NOW looking for it....This nygga said "YOU BETTA FUQQ THAT BED NYGGA!" Now that's some shyt......LMAO! That's the most prolific shyt I EVA heard ROG say......

Damn I can tell I'm angry, my use of the word Nygga has increased as I continue to type....LOL!....

I'll be back later.....

Saving Lives in North Dakota.....or NOT!!!!!

Wassup I've had more than enough time to blog this week, but I just haven't had the mental energy needed to do so...I'm burnt the fuqq out....Anyway, here I am in sunny cold ass North Dakota. The good gubment job sent their token to handle some flood shyt out here......why? I have no damn clue......Anyway, I've been here one week and I've seen so many sights.....let's just discuss a few of the events that occurred this week....

SUN....I arrived in the beginning of a blizzard which left 18 inches of snow.....

checked into my room to the pleasure of a 19 inch bigg butt tv...

and a microwave from the 80's.....

The only good thing about the hotel is that they give you Hennessy to go.....



Anyway, I couldn't get a rental car until thursday,and when I did they gave me a this....


I mean really.....what the fuqq did I do to someone to deserve this shyt....But I gotta get around so I took the car and everywhere I go I just park far as shyt from the door....


We set up a Joint field office for the various agencies that are here at the site of an old strip mall, you can't really see the lines on the ground so apparently everyone felt the need to park near me....



Needless to say, I had to borrow a car to go to lunch that day......

I've been counting the number of black people in this town, and I'm sad to say I haven't seen one that doesn't work for my agency since Friday.....so the total non Gov't black population is 4....

More to come, I'm gonna go buy some more vodka from walmart.....LOL

One Step Forward, Three Steps Back.....

Well, I don't even have enough words right now to explain the feelings I have after watching this promo....LOL! I've never been a plies fan, I may listen to some of his music, but overall this dude is a clown....But with the rise of reality tv shows that are coming out I guess anything is possible....this video did not and could not make my boxers move, and I totally think I have a new found phobia of midgets....I mean with their overally large asses and and overally small frames...the last thing I needed was this....i'm sad america.....this fuqqery has me wanting to go back and drink milk just to get a lil bit taller....*HARD CRY*

Fuqq~

Oh you mad cuz I'm Styling on You....

I was talkin to my folks about this earlier, and had to post it....it's a little old but funny as hell......

The Blanket With Sleeves......FOR REAL SON!!!!

Sooo this am, I'm riding the train, and as the weather gets nicer more and more tourists are out and about in the DMV... I decided I wanted some leg room so i went all the way to the last car, and what do I see....The Infamous SNUGGIE!!!!





Anyone who has a Blackberry curve knows you can't try and be low key and take pics because the shutter sound can't be cut off :-( so needless to say I didn't take one.. but I digress

WTF America.....A blanket with sleeves son...and you coons wanna buy it... yall are really gonna let someone get recession proof over a blanket with 2 holes cut in it? you must have also bought the wonderful......

Anyway...seriously my granny had a similar idea back when I was a kid, it was simple.. put on some fuqqin clothes.... DUH! You weren't cutting no holes in her blanket... and you damn sure better not have left the blanket on the couch... this bamma sitting here look like


which I wanted to be one when I was younger but that's another blog for another group of readers.... until the next time....stay classy DMV!!

When music was real...........

I'm tired of the radio playing strange new hits such as the stanky leg, and turn my swag on.....what happened to good ol fashioned crooning....I miss the day of my folks playing OLD SCHOOL music....so while searching my daily sites, I ran across this young balladeer...(DING)

Turn Your Swag On........Or Not!!!!

My people what in the holy fuqq are you doing? I blame anyone who wears skinny jeans, big name belts, colorful shirts, and uses a boost mobile for this shyt getting air time.......



I've never been labeled a hater so please don't get it twisted, THIS SHYT IS FUQQIN WACK!! If I hear another kid on the train singin this shyt while stanky legg'n i'm gonna lose my damn mind....whatever happened to real rap...fuqq that what happened to hip-hop......this the type of music u can't beef over..this shyt will not get you ambushed in the lobby of a studio, or get you shot in a drive by, but this shyt will get you punched in the face if I hear you singing it... Soulja Boy huh? Get The Hell On......

Have you done your taxes yet?

Well if not, take your w2's down to this fuqqery spot.......I know we're in a recession but gott damn black people......

Why I'm Probably Not Gonna Ever Lose Weight in Gold's Gym

Well Well Fuqqin Well......I'm back...I know, I know, I said I was back a few months. My demise has been greatly exaggerated..... Anyway, a lot has been going on with me over the last few months, but either I don’t' remember it, or it's not enough to post about... BUT...I do have something.....I've gained a significant amount of weight since I don’t' know.....last year...and um...although, I can still fit all of my clothes...I've recently taken on the term of FAT BOY by some of my friends... Or Portis' stunt double etc.....FYI...all of you can kiss my entire ass...LOL so I decided GOTT DAMMIT enough is enough, picked up my gym bag and headed off to Gold's Gym....I've got a Govt discount and a membership is $15 monthly...so Yesterday was my 1st day back in the gym...I stroll in and headed to the locker room....as I just clear the locker room entryway...who do I see: Mr. I'm Not ghey, Mr. I'm Obese but I'm trying, Mr. I'm One Stamp away from winning the Publishers Clearing House aka Blue from Old school....

Immediately I know this is going to be a long hour.......

Anyway, I get to an open locker, change and head out to begin my workout....

I walk over to the treadmill.....got to get the heartbeat elevated and burn off a few calories to warm up.....I look over and Mr. I'm not ghey is on the elliptical machine.... now normally I guess that's cool... but something just seemed wrong.. He didn't seem to be focused.... his attention was off to the left... I continue running a little while longer and I see Mr. I'm obese but I'm trying working with the personal trainer... YEAH MAN, good for you. I salute you... Ok so cardio is done, and I walk over to begin my upper body workout... arms, back, chest, etc....Mr. Obese gets off the exercise mat, damn near in tears....(this could be interesting) he's exhausted I mean...She works hard for the money, flash dance soundtrack type of exhausted...His trainer who just happens to be 1/8 of his size and looks like she hasn't eaten a carb in 6 years says.... come on SUCK it up....at that EXACT moment...Mr. I'm not ghey pops out of no where like the butler on Mr. Deeds.... Just watching this Bammas crouch.....LOL! So I move to the next set of equipment, times goes on....and my workout is now done, I'm heading back to the locker room.... As soon as I walk in... Mr Obese Walks in about 2 mins behind me. then it happens... this nygga begins to get fully undressed and just walk around...weighing himself... he gets off the scale and proceed to take his fat ass in the Sauna (still naked) followed by ...........you guessed it......Mr. I'm not ghey....:-/ so by now, I’m thinking it's a sausage fest in here, fuqq the shower today, and get ur ass back to the office... I turn to open my locker and who the fuqq is in front of me...BLUE....his old 87 yr old ass butt ass naked eating an apple.... R U FUQQIN SERIOUS MAN! Fuqq my life....

I'm ok with a little male locker room chat but dammit don't have ur sack out asking me about AIG and the bailout....I'm not going to answer......Fellas get it together...I'm bout to invest in my boys bowflex or something...if it's like this during the winter, summer time going to be an all cockfest, and I'm giving my ticket back :-( Fuqq working out